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 by Louise C on 2004 Oct 19 - 11:37 | reply to this comment
 Ingenious!
 I think this plan has great merit. For one thing it gives a man an excellent way to test the waters as gradually as he likes without making a fool of himself or doing anything outrageous right off the bat. The point seems to be to sieze control by increments and I like the way cooperation in being dominated is well-linked with gestures most women would find romantic. (A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down and all that.)
 
 Also, when you approach a woman commandingly it simply has the effect of making it easier for her to cooperate than for her to put up a fuss. In taking the initiative you help her to relax. You give her a chance to discover what submission feels like. You remove the need for her having to pass judgement then and there. When a man is too tentative he leaves the ball in the woman's court. She may respond badly out of embarassment, pride or confusion even though she does, in fact, harbor submissive desires. The article gives men a general feel for the most useful attitude to adopt with a woman whom they are trying to take in hand. I think that is important information. Many men don't quite "get" why women respond sexually and emotionally to a bit of firmness. It is the combination of kindness and confident insistence that is so attractively masculine. It makes us feel safe, secure, valued and loved. And yet it must be hard for men to behave commandingly while feeling that they need to test the waters quite tentatively. I sympathize with their plight and think the author of this article is giving them good advice. I think that the beauty of this approach is that it is likely to work well with different types of women. Of course, some women will hate the whole thing I suppose. But the man would be able to find that out too without causing a rift in the relationship.
 
 

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